prices paid and benefits earned

Saying that things have been strange lately is an understatement. Living in China as an expat is different than I imagine it would be living as an immigrant in America. Can't say for sure, but I believe we feel safer.

a bit over 10 years ago, i arrived in Zhongshan, and in my first week, I was directed to the Friends Bar. It was (and is) a fairly unassuming place. I've been in other expat bars here and elsehwere, and they tend to be a bit dark, with flags from all over, a bunch of Chinese people, and classic rock playing. Friends wasn't really any different. Nothing wrong with it. just a comfortable bar.

A few hours later i understood why I had been told to go there. A group of other foreigners discovered there were a few new people, and came over and introduced themselves. The welcome was fairly overwhelming.

Over time, I'd be in and out of that group, as i developed close friendships with many locals, but there was always a feeling of welcome there. It sounds cliched to say we tended to act like a family, but that's what my memory assures me was the case.

So ten years have gone by, and there are about 20 times the foreigners there were then. There are 3 foreign bars in ZS, and another on the way. There are also those who prefer different Chinese clubs, more who stay home, and plenty of people I have never met. There are a lot of advantages to living in a place with a larger foreign population. Can buy better cheese. better restaurants (I need to stop blogging before I eat). There are chances to do things other than sit in the same bar with the same people and hear the same stories. Generally, it's better to be here now instead of in 99.

Then this happened. I'm only aware of one crime this serious involving a foreigner in Zhongshan. There has been violence, but nothing near this. What makes it worse is that one of us called guys to kill another one of us, and they did it in a place we always called home.

So there are two conflicting things happening now. There is a fear now that wasn't here a month ago. There are definitely some people who want to sit at home for a bit, and wait to make sure this is over (I do believe it is, but no one is sure). there are people who go out, but avoid Friends, or all the foreign bars. It feels at times like I'm in a long story, and the narrator is saying "Things were never quite the same. It was hard to get back to normal, and people began to move on to other places. last i heard, Bill had moved on to Sri Lanka, where he runs a fish and chip stand near the beach. Shame the man hates seafood with a passion."

At the same time, there is a certain closeness and concern that had disappeared. One of us was attacked, and the four foreigners there leapt to his defense. thirty seconds later, the staff was there, helping those of us who were bleeding. We ran out without telling them where we were going, so they called other staff members, until one was found with my nuumber. So when this happened, the intended victim wasn't alone. Everyone nearby tried to help. One of the few good things I saw at that time was that there was no hesitation on anyone's part. Chris was attacked, and 4 moved at once to help. When i got hurt, a few 18-20 year old waitresses ran towards me with towels instead of running in the office and locking the door, or heading out the front door. There is a peculiar comfort you can take in that.

The instinct people had was to help. I can certainly attest that the impulse extended to others. I got a lot of phone calls from people. Some were trying to learn what happened, but almost everyone asked the same questions: Can I help Chris? and Can I help you? People have been supportive, offering time, money, food, encouragement, advice, and whatever else i needed.

Robert, the young guy in the fight, has had a few more experienced guys take an interest in him, offering to teach him more about international trade and sales. It's partially a way to thank him, and partially, I think, a desire to help a newer guy out. people are going beyond what they need to do, in a way they might not have done a few months ago.

I certainly do not believe that what happened is for the best. I sincerely hope that the responsible party is either deported or imprisoned. A lot of people are harmed, and the potential closeness wasn't worth it. Just noting what I see