progressively unnecessary

What was that?

2010-11-21T16:13:00.001-08:00

last Friday, Zhongshan had a small earthquake. Something like a 3.5 I hear. I missed it, being in Guangzhou for a softball game. A native told me that this was the first time he knew of an earthquake here, then another gwailo told me there was another small one 6 years ago. No damage noted anywhere.

The trip to Guangzhou was odd. Because of the Asian Games, the city banned half of the cars (even license plates one day, odd the next), planted flowers and trees everywhere, and has done a lot to make the place cleaner and less of an eyesore. It seemed almost livable. I mentioned this to someone visiting ZS from GZ, who assured me that locals don't expect that to last. Still, a clean and pleasant GZ seems unnatural

Movember

2010-11-21T09:55:00.000-08:00

Growing a moustache to raise money to help fight cancer or some such thing. What do I know? Someone told me if I grew a moustache, the world would be better and I'd be slightly shaggier.

This is a cause I feel strongly about and I'm asking you to support my efforts by making a donation to me. To help, you can either:
- Click this link http://au.movember.com/mospace/1293262/ and donate online using your credit card or PayPal account

Right now, Zhongshan has three teams, and mine is dead last. yay moustache!

holding pattern

2010-10-30T01:50:00.000-07:00

Haven't had too much happen over the last month.

visited Thailand and Xiamen. Thailand is a weird place, particularly if you go on a Chinese tour. Some people go there for bizarre sex shows, some for the ancient culture. Chinese tours try to cater to both groups, which creates a schizo feeling. We skipped the naughtier events, but still found ourselves watching a lot of singing transexuals. The temples are more attractive to me, despite us normally arriving at 8:00. If you ever go to Thailand on a Chinese tour, I highly recommend making the effort to skip the endless Chinese buffets and find Thai food. Much better than lukewarm Cantonese cuisine.

Xiamen is near Taiwan, and was a pleasant place to visit. K really wanted to go, and I'm still not sure. Saw a few other places, including Hakka communal homes, which were more interesting. There's something funny about a Chinese girl being entranced by rice and tea farms. You'd think she'd have seen those two things before.

Beginning to work full time at the Friend's Bar. When I first moved here, it was the first place I went where people really worked to make me feel at home. I've never forgotten, and have tried to do the same for new people since. Now I get paid to do it, and free drinks. Of course, free drinks lose something when you have classes at 8:00 in the morning.

Still plan on leaving in February. My school is good to me, but the pay is pretty low. More importantly, I have a strong desire to see somewhere new. Not sure where, just want a change. Since I'm dating someone who shares that desire, seems a good time to explore. Most likely, we'll be movin to somewhere north and east of here in China, though it is possible we'll go the opposite direction and wind up in Singapore. So far, there is some interest from potential employers with jobs I'm interested in. Looking to see who makes the best offer.

Snooty

2010-10-29T02:58:00.001-07:00

Someone sent me this to see if I'd do better than English or French people. Doubtful.

1. Can you talk about "Mad Men?" no

2. Can you talk about the "The Sopranos?" no

3. Do you know who replaced Bob Barker on "The Price Is Right?" yes, due to a n unfortunate resemblance to Drew Carey

4. Have you watched an Oprah show from beginning to end? no

5. Can you hold forth animatedly about yoga?Nope.

6. How about pilates? Nope.

7. How about skiing? Nope.

8. Mountain biking? Nope.

9. Do you know who Jimmie Johnson is? no clue

10. Does the acronym MMA mean nothing to you? Mixed Martial Arts. I don't enjoy it, but at least this rings a bell

11. Can you talk about books endlessly? there are a few people that will attest that it seems endless.

12. Have you ever read a "Left Behind" novel? read the first one and was appalled. I thought Christianity was based on loving God through embracing your fellow man, not this callous, hateful diatribe against humanity. Read the slacktivist for more detailed analysis.

13. How about a Harlequin romance? I immediately think of the Batman character everytime the word harlequin is used. I haven't read one

14. Do you take interesting vacations? interesting to me. My last few involved elephant rides, transexual conga lines to techno Christmas carols, watching my gf eat scorpions, Chinese minority fortresses and eating hot peppers to try to win a bet. So kind of dull

15. Do you know a great backpacking spot in the Sierra Nevada? nope

16. What about an exquisite B and B overlooking Boothbay Harbor? I'll have to admit I couldn't say where Boothbay harbor is.

17. Would you be caught dead in an RV? I don't see myself ever being in one, but I don't have any objection to them. I suppose if I'm dead, I don't have much say in the matter.

18. Would you be caught dead on a cruise ship? again, no real desire to go on one, but no real objection. I'm also only attrracted to girls with weak stomachs

19. Have you ever heard of of Branson, Mo? yes, but I'd prefer Bronson

20. Have you ever attended a meeting of a Kiwanis Club? no, but I'd go for the peanuts

21. How about the Rotary Club? Nope.

22. Have you lived for at least a year in a small town? By Chinese reckoning, yes, but I'd be in a large town or possibly small city by US standards. That I live outside the US seems to disqualify me from being a real American anyway. I don't hate foreigners; I am a foreigner

23. Have you lived for a year in an urban neighborhood in which most of your neighbors did not have college degrees? I believe son, though I never went around asking for diplomas.

24. Have you spent at least a year with a family income less than twice the poverty line? i guess so

25. Do you have a close friend who is an evangelical Christian? maybe not real clos, but a few who sort of count

26. Have you ever visited a factory floor? yes, often when I was younger.

27. Have you worked on one? no

28. Did you go to public school? no

29. Did you go to public university? yes

30. Did you go to public graduate school. didn't go to grad school yet

31. Do you follow college football? no

32. Do you follow association football (soccer)? no

33. Do you eat at fast food restaurants? very rarely here, unless we're leaving a club and I'm outvoted.

34. Do you eat fried chicken? no

35. Do you eat meat? no

36. Have you ever visited Europe? Yes. Wow, is this really make me un-American?

37. Do you own a gun? No. Maybe it should be noted that it is impossible where I live, as private gun ownership is outlawed. It's generally held I owe my life to that fact. I suppose I should be in fear all the time, as I can't shoot intruders, but instead feel far safer than I ever did in my home town

photos

2010-10-28T22:52:00.000-07:00

photos are still being posted at zsrenn.com (or zslenstuff.ning.com if you feel like typing more). Click on me and then go see the photos. Thailand, Xiamen/Meizhou and a friend's wedding are there. It may change soon toa site you need to register to use, but at the moment it should be visible to all

woo hoo

2010-10-28T22:51:00.001-07:00

I seemed to finally have access again. Shame I need to walk out the door in a minute or two instead of posting more about classes, my new gig at the bar, upcoming Halloween events, various farewells, and other goings on

flying

2010-10-28T22:48:00.001-07:00

I'd probably stay awake for this

Thailand

2010-10-01T00:11:00.002-07:00

Thailand was great fun. We got back late last night and got a call this morning that the trip to Xiamen on the 4th was canclled, but two spots had been saved for us on the 2nd. So today consists of washing clothes and packing again. hopefully, karen will find time to post photos on zslenstuff.ning.com for the world to enjoy. If not, give it a few days, and one of us will do it when we return.

the not so distant future

2010-09-16T23:45:00.000-07:00

It seems I will not begin work until after the National Day holiday, so early next month. Before the holiday, K & I will head down to Thailnd for about a week. After it, we will probably head up to Xiamen for a few days. I know it's kind of near Taiwan, and that's about it. That, and she really wants to go. And for the first time, I will watch two friends get married via webcam in the US. Neat

flu 3

2010-09-14T03:16:00.001-07:00

The treatment is to have someone take a glass ball with an opening, run a flame across it to heat it, and stick it on your back, where the heat creates some suction. Supposedly, negative energy will be drained. I'm unsure if it helped, but my back does seem to have pepperoni slices on it.

If someone had aksed me what I expected of my first week back, being sheared and covered in pepperoni was not high on my list of expectations.

flu 2

2010-09-14T03:14:00.000-07:00

Since my back hurt, Karen decided we should go to a massage parlor for the glass ball thing. We had tried it previously, but it didn't work because of my hairiness. So she informed me of her decision by plugging in a razor and beginning to shave my back. Of all the ways I've been woken up, that is perhaps the most disorienting.

flu

2010-09-14T03:13:00.000-07:00

woke up really sick Friday, and pretty much stayed sick through Sunday. So my plans changed from "go out and see friends" and "go out and see Karen's friends" to "stay in bed and feel lousy." Karen's plans changed to "watch movie and take care of a gigantic baby."

My back was very sore from this, and that kept me from sleeping. The lack of sleep in turn made me sicker, which made the back hurt more, etc. Medicine eventually knocked me out and broke the fever.

hmm

2010-09-08T20:22:00.002-07:00

seems I can post short things. Also seems I can't post pictures, videos, etc, or embed links. Whatever criticisms I have of China, I will give their censors a hat tip. Kudos

home again 4

2010-09-08T20:20:00.001-07:00

We also have a new plan for taking attendance and disciplining students who don't come. My students don't receive a grade, so now I will be forced to deal with 100 students in a class, many of whom don't wish to be there. Probably best i focus on bookkeeping and discipline, instead of wasting my time on students who want to learn to speak English.

On the other hand. it's nice to see Karen again. She's cool

home again 3

2010-09-08T20:19:00.000-07:00

I'm also being hounded about writing a syllabus, with no idea what classes I'm teaching, what textbooks we're using, how many classes we have, or any other vital information.

home again 2

2010-09-08T20:14:00.001-07:00

My school is off to a frustrating start. No one knows when we begin, what my schedule is, or whether I have anything to do on campus for the next three weeks. We have a holiday coming, but no one can tell me when it begins or ends. This is putting a crimp in my travel plans, though I suspect I'll just make the plans and then tell the school.

home again

2010-09-08T20:11:00.000-07:00

Having a lot of trouble with this thing.

plans I make

2010-08-30T23:30:00.000-07:00

I'll be inChicago for 2 more days. Wednesday I'll be out, meeting up with people and saying goodbye.

Thursday I'll be heading to New Jersey to see one of my favorite people get married.

Sunday I head back to China, arriving Tuesday afternoon (time difference and a long trip).

Wednesday Isee the girl who wants to make me forget that today I divorced someone I thought I'd be with until I died. I was wrong. I was fortunate to be with The Bear for 8 years, and I'm fortunate I'm with Karen now.

FAQs

2010-08-11T08:58:00.000-07:00

1. Are you and The Bear getting a divorce?
Yes

2. When did you decide that?
November

3. Is there any chance that will change?
no

4. Are you two still friends? Do you still love her?
yes. Yes

5. S0...you and Karen...?
yes

Lollapalooza-Sunday

2010-08-11T08:42:00.000-07:00

Me "We have a lot of time to get there"
Bear "We are not missing the Cribs. I'll leave you if we do"

Ok, maybe too soon.

I had never heard of Mumford & Sons until I was flying home and heard them on the plane. I guess they have a hit (of sorts) but this is the song I heard, and it blew me away. Everything else was godo too. One of the best surprises of the weekend, and not just because it gave me an excuse to say "Mumford" a lot.

Always wanted to go to the dj part, and my nondancing spouse never wanted to. She made an exception for a few hours, in part because there was no one else she really wanted to see, and partially because she's a wonderful person. She seemed to really enjoy it.

Going to see MGMT, we had to make a choice; fight through the massive crowd to try to get somewhere that the 4'11 Bear could see, or head across the field where the sound was terrible but where we would be right in front for the National. We chose the latter, but tried to enjoy MGMT.

The National were way better than expected. We thought they'd be good, but they blew us away. Definitely the right decision about where to stand. The singer was right in front of us at the beginning, before climbing a wall and heading out into the crowd.

Finally, the arcade Fire. Simply put, one of the best concerts I have ever seen. Words fail me. The video doesn't quite capture how awesome it was, but you get the idea.

Lollapalooza-Saturday

2010-08-11T08:17:00.000-07:00

I'm not sure what is wrong with me, but I keep showing up to watch Canadians. I only encourage them. Still, I really like the new Stars album, so what could I do?

Against Me was good enough to make us leave The stars early. Might be my favorite album fromt his year. Might not. But maybe. The Bear was perplexed by the decision to do this song and "babe, I'm an Anarchist" as I guess it seems inconsistent. She did approve of the idea of fires.

Any chance that arises to see Gogol Bordello should be seized. Amazing again.

man, we walked a lot on saturday. We darted acroos the park to catch the beginning of Metric. One of the bands I didn't expect much from, but we almost stayed for the whole thing. really good.

Instead we went back to the South side to catch Social Distortion, and our lives are richer for the experience.

then darted over to catch Edward Sharpe and the Magnetic eroes. I never heard of them, which made me in the minority. We're somewhere in the midst of this giant crowd which was singing along like maniacs. it was unreal. Bittersweet to hear the Bear sing this, as home is apparently not wherever I am

Then went back over to see green Day. What can I say? they were huge. They were great. Wish we could have seen Phoenix too, but definitely the correct call was made.

Lollapalooza-Friday

2010-08-11T07:48:00.000-07:00

Lollapalooza, probably for the final time for me. A great chance to smell your fellow man and take in music.

The walkmen underwhelmed me. Hearing the new songs was ok, but when they did their old stuff, it just showed why I've lost interest. Still, it was worth coming to hear the Rat.

Rapahel Saadiq was the first of many pleasant surprises this year. Had heard good things, but neither of us had ever heard a song by him. Enjoyed every second.

The Drive By Truckers weren't really a surprise. We had high expectations, and they were met. Really not the sort of band either of us would like, but they are too good not to be liked.

We had left the south side of the fest to hear the New Pornographers. 4 years ago, they blew us away, and had made 2 really good albums since. This was the first act we saw that had excellent whistling and the first one that left with us wanting to ehar a lot more. Damn, I have been forced to say good things about a bunch of Canadians.

I'll admit, I had no desire to see Matt & Kim, and no real idea who they were. I wouldn't say they were the most fun to watch, but it was clear they were having the most fun out of everyone we saw that day. It would be tough not to enjoy them, since they clearly were thrilled to be there. The decision to stand on the crowd and dance is to be applauded.

Hot Chip, on the other hand, we both wanted to see. They were a bit more energetic than expected, though they did not dance on the crowd. Halfway through their set, we became obsessed with whether it was the guy from the Eurythmics and the singer from the Hold Steady going undercover. Doesn't sound like either band, but the resemblance was uncanny. we may have had heat stroke.

Chromeo was our dinner break. We were sitting dowen far away kind of watching, and thus kind of enjoyed them. Probably more fun up close.

Ok, going to see Lady gaga was a mistake. Not enough of a trainwreck to be entertaining in a bad way, and way too slow and drawn out to be entertaining in a good way. Should have gone to see the Strokes. The video clip below features a long, pointless break before she starts, which gives a good indication of what it was like. Still, it's one of my girlfriend's favorite songs, so I kind of enjoyed it. the Bear enjoyed it much less.

I'm barely literate

2010-07-25T21:49:00.000-07:00

I write like
Stephenie Meyer

I Write Like by Mémoires, Mac journal software. Analyze your writing!

so filled with rage

Plans

2010-07-25T21:48:00.000-07:00

I'll be back in America in about 2 weeks, stay for a month, then return to China.

kindergarten

2010-07-12T03:24:00.000-07:00

Find more photos like this on ZSRenn中山人 在上面找更多和这个类似的照片

life lessons

2010-07-04T20:24:00.000-07:00

1. A startled look and yelled curses are one response to vehicles almost hitting you when you cross the street. So is looking in the street to see if there are cars. I recommend the latter.

2. when teaching kindergarten, always choose songs with dances. try to choose dances that involve them falling down.

3. If your girlfriend falls down more than 5 times at a party and you don't persuade her to leave, it is a huge mistake to assume I will keep an eye on her. Except to possibly laugh if she continues to fall down.

4. People falling down=always funny

5. apple wine is sweet, delicious, and refreshing, but a poor substititue for water on sunny days in the tropics.

6. kindergarten students hug their teachers more than college students.

7. If you have a cheerful, helpful foreing Enlgihs teacher and are entered into an English speaking contest, it might be wise to practice with that teacher.

8. if you're in n Englihs speaking contests and choose to speak about the environment, learn how to say the word "environment." It will help a lot.

Something I learned today

2010-06-22T19:59:00.000-07:00

The new motorbike is quicker and more agile than the last, making it safer and more fun to drive. The gauges are also slightly different, and it uses power faster than the old one. Leading to learning that it is lighter and easier to push home than the old one, should I run out of power

Now my heart is full

2010-06-21T23:49:00.000-07:00

Except for a few episodes that didn't load, I have now seen every episode of the Simpsons. Thanks simpsonsepisodes.com!

Pretty much sums up my holiday

timing

2010-06-17T19:03:00.000-07:00

post that i'm feeling ill, and ten minutes later, someone calls and offers to cook for me. Tuly is awesome.

A day with nothing to do, other than grade a semester's worth of homework. sigh...

vacation

2010-06-16T18:37:00.000-07:00

little new going on.

got the physial for a new visa. I lost about 50 lbs sine i first moved here. Sadly, still a ways to go.

Bought a new electri bike. This one is a bit faster than the last one, and is new, making it even faster. Apparently, crashing a bike sometimes slows it down, so I'll attempt to not hit things with this one.

trying to find part time work for the summer. since i already work here part time, i'm focusing on looking for something here, which narrows the field considerably.

Apparently, the number of vegetarians here is rising. I was interviewed by someone regarding why foreigners are veg and the challenges it presents. Of the four vegetarians I've known here, we ha 4 different reasons for not eating meat, which makes for long answers. I suspect I will be quoted regarding vegetarianism and weight loss. My normal response when people ask how I can be a fat vegetarian is to poin out that tigers are thin and elephants are fat. I hope they include my statement that my weight dropped noticeably 2 months ago, when i attempted to eliminate cola (and all other forms of high fructose corn syrup) from my diet.

I suggested a cooking show called "Knives and Fire" where a gwailo wanders China and people attempt to teach him how to cook. Keep checking your fall schedule to see if I'm there.

Woke up at 8:00 for the Dragon Boat Festival. Saw it was raining and deided the beach was not the place to go. My travel ompanions went back to sleep. I cooked. We ate. Then everyone in the apartment went back to sleep. Woke up around 1:00. Went shopping for jeans and came home. Cooked another dinner of fresh veggies, watched some Battle Star Galactica, then went to sleep early. So after d ay of eating right, sleeping, and staying away from alcohol and second hand smoke, I woke up with a sore throat and slight cold. I'll try treating it with sleep deprivation, bourbon, and fast food.

Up for the weekend: Club 8's one year anniversary and Tom's birthday. lub 8 is a fairly standard disco near my favorite bar, and hey are giving free beer to ertain people, such as me. Tom is an Aussie, who is not giving free beer, but is arranging and evening of enchantment and whimsy (ok, beer and vodka). I suspect this will be a rough weekend

Why does God mock me?

2010-06-06T21:43:00.000-07:00

11:15: explain to a friend that I want to stay in Zhongshan another year, as it makes me happy.
11:30 go outside and find scooter has been stolen

the question all sane people should ask

2010-06-06T21:42:00.000-07:00

Ebert is always right

finals?

2010-06-03T21:29:00.000-07:00

Finished my final exam today. Each department apparently has a different ending date for classes, so I'm in the odd position of having finished my final exams, but may still have classes. Though I might be finished. I'm kind of tempted to quit next year and see how long it takes anyone torealize. I think I might not be replaced until November. They are amazingly disorganized.

Songs they liked

This one, maybe not as much

exam week

2010-05-30T21:17:00.000-07:00

Friday, a student in my business English class asked if they had an exam. I said yes, but didn't know when. They then told me that it was our final class. My boss confirmed this 20 minutes later, and suggested i give an exam then. When offered a choice between a surprise final and an additional week of class, they voted to have exams this week. Good choice, as several weren't there.

So today we had an exam. It's my first time talking to a few of them, and it's sometimes nice finding out that they ave learned something. For a few, it may have been there first time attempting to speak English. Each exam is 2-3 minutes of speaking to me, and for some it was an eternity.

As it's entirely oral, I didn't want everyone listening, so I had music playing with pictures of me and my friends as a slideshow. The music and pictures were randomly chosen by a socail network site (similar to myspace or facebook).

They liked this and this

and really liked this

This they didn't like

and one ran up and skipped to the next track rather than hear this

foreigners+wigs=comedy gold

dust settles

2010-05-24T21:37:00.000-07:00

The last year was chaos, though sometiems entertaining and rewarding chaos. Now things have calmed down, and i'm settling into a routine. Blogging about stabbings, quitting jobs, etc=moderately interesting. Blogging about gong to the gym and teaching adult classes=dull.

Did an exercise where the students are given a group of people and asked to choose 5 to put on a spaceship before an asteroid kills everyone on Earth. Like many of my activities, this one isn't about the right answer, but about explaining your reasoning. It didn't go well in the first 2 classes, but today was awesome.

"I would leave the little girl, because she might cry."

"I would take the mechhanic so we can try to build a PS3"

"I can't decide. I want to take the best looking men."

"Who will pay me the most?"

"Can I choose 6 people and I stay here? This sounds like it would be more fun to die"

so...

2010-05-24T01:10:00.000-07:00

The proxy hasn't been working quite right, so I haven't been posting.

Thought of moving to Burma,but will not be going now. Perhaps later. I still love China, but kind of want to seeing more of the world. Unless something amazing comes along, I'll be in Zhongshan another year. After that, I might leave, then return again. Or not.

Things are fairly calm and stable, whih makes for a happy life and boring blog

back

2010-05-05T05:42:00.000-07:00

Vietnam was good. Not a big fan of the people, who are blatant gougers and con men, but the country was beautiful. It was a lot of fun watching karen and Ying adjust to being foreigners, and a real nice feeling being her translator and spokesman (I don't speak Vietnamese, but can translate broken English to standard English. That, and a tiny bit of French)

having some computer issues again. Hoping for a new proxy soon, and more photos

Vietnam

2010-04-27T02:04:00.000-07:00

I'm getting more excited about Vietnam. I haven't left China in something like 8 months, so it will be nice to go somewhere else. My semi-endearing sidekick karen will be leaving her home country for the first time in her life, so she's a bit more excited. neither of us can say anything in Vietnamese, and we have a vague idea of where we are going.

Photos and pointless stories to come next week. Still have a few days of teaching first

PSA

2010-04-27T01:56:00.001-07:00

For all Chinese students of English; past, present and future, note that "Can you introduce me to foreigners so i can practice my English?" is a request that will be met with a "no" every time. You are asking me to impose upon my friends, asking them to work for free teaching you. Not going to happen.

There are a fair number of foreigners here, and we aren't hard to find. W e stick out in crowds. If I ask you what you did this weekend, and the answer is "nothin" "Computer games" or 'studied" then it seems we found ths source of the problem. Stop asking me to ask my friends to do boring stuff, find something interesting to do, and offer to include us. it's reallly that simple.

Note that you will be penalized further if you do think of stuff that sounds interesting, but don't offer to include the foreign friends you wish to make, instead wanting them to meet and help you practive English.

i have Chinese friends, and happily practice English with them. I actually prepare things to teach a few. But if they had introduced themselves by asking for a time consuming favor, they'd be a distant memory at best.

tripping

2010-04-20T06:09:00.000-07:00

Bought tickets today for Vietnam. It's a bus trip, and should last a few days. I should not be contacting anyone for cash

Sunshine

2010-04-17T21:27:00.000-07:00

A few good friends work with a group called Sunshine, which works to provide medical assistance and other support for familes with disabled members. The group is legit and 100% of the people are volunteers, so there is alittle overhead.

One of the sad things about life in modern China is that the social safety net is shrinking, and looks pretty threadbare. Medical coverage is far from universal, and people do die because they can't afford treatment. My experiences have been positive, but that's in part because foreigners are assumed to be able to pay. If i have no money, presumably someone else will pay. Chinese are not afforded that same concern.

Anyway, I think I'll be more active with that group soon. It's about $30 a month (something over $300 a year) to sponsor a disabled person, which provides better medical care and basic foodstuffs. I don't plan on harping on it here, but if anyone would like to help out, please let me know (billbarlo at gmail.com).

And again, my thanks for those who sent e-mails asking about me (and others. ) here after the recent earthquake. We didn't notice it at all here. I was in more danger from hurricane katrina in Chicago than I was from the Qinghai earthquake here. No one needed to dig me out, and I didn't need to scramble for food or water. That said, some people did. While I tend to send money to the AFSC, the Red Cross is one of the things that makes me think there's hope for humanity. With the planet falling apart, help us third worlders out.

there goes the neighborhood

2010-04-17T21:06:00.000-07:00

Last night was a friend's birthday. Len's a pretty popular guy, so a lot of people turned out. It was also reggae night at the busiest expat bar, so a few people were there who don't know Len at all.

At one point, a few of us who came here a decade ago took a head count and realized there were more foreigners in the bar on Saturday night then there were in the whole city back then.

Most of the other old timers seemed to have no idea who most of the new people are. being kind of a new person in some ways, I knew more. Still, there were plenty of new faces.

It was kind of cool having this brought to my attention. It made me realize how weird and mixed the community of expats is. people who have lived in larger Chiense cities tell me there are different groups. Business people don't talk much to teachers, Germans, italians, and others have their own cliques, etc.

So last night, I started off with a group of English speaking teachers, then drifted over to hang out with some Russians. I then fell in with the old timers, wandered off with a few French people (mes amis, c'est vrai. Je n'ai jamais etudie le francais. Je parle, mais c'est parce que je suis tres fute. un genie), and wound up back with Americans and Aussies. We then went off to the club, where the lines continued to blur.

There is an odd sort of tension for expats here. I think many of us kind of dislike being lumped together as "foreigners." A canadian who has lived here for 10 years is very different from an Aussie in his third week. For french, germans, Italians, Russians and the various Arabic speakers, it must be tiring to constantly need to speak English, as very few Chinese study your language. No one likes being lumped in with the Americans, and we, in turn, deal with constant misconceptions about our country (two of the biggest gripes we have is that we are criticized for only speaking one language, and for knowing nothing about the rest of the world. While those criticisms have some merit when applied to Americans as a whole, it rarely applies to Americans here. There's generally not much difference between Americans and other expats in our knowledge of Chinese, and I'd respectfully say that if you made a list of the most knowledgable, well educated, cerebral expats in Zhongshan, Americans would be overrepresented. Of course, we left the States behind :) Still last night I got to see the foreign community as a community. A large, diverse group of people where language, religion, nationality, gender, and race don't matter. it's not always the case, but when things align right, it feels good..

Teaching: the Musical

2010-04-16T20:51:00.000-07:00

Had a week of teaching songs to classes. I use them to teach grammar points and cslang, but mostly to talk about culture. Ok, I also do it because it's fun.

My advanced English class was exposed to my favorite musician, Bob Mould. The basic theme of the song is nostalgia, and pining for the good old days. Lead to a discussion on changes in China, and what era they regarded as a high point. Most chose now or the late 90s for entirely personal reasons

My other English classes at the college got off easier, hearing Big Star. A song about young awkward love wouldn't seem to resonate well with young adults aged 19 or 20, but most of them act like they're 12, so it went fine. It's awesome when someone argues passionately that the line "would you be an outlaw for my love?" suggest a form of madness, as partners are far less important than family; while their boyfriend or girlfirend is in the same class.

At my nighttime job at the other college, they were exposed to the magnetic field's. Some were suitably grateful, and it was requested that more magnetic Fields songs be played, or that the songs be shared with the students who can then marvel at their greatness alone. This would be sort of the opposite of a love song, and lead to discussions of love, romance, and dating. As a general notice to furtue classes, when there are 20 women in the room and 3 men, the teacher is not necessarily on your side. I'm far from the door, and need to get out alive

Earthquake

2010-04-14T07:45:00.000-07:00

Apparently, western China was hit by a bad earthquake today. Im nowhere near Qinghai, and we didn't notice a thing here. I asked a few friend about it, and they had no idea what I was talking about it. No doubt this will be a huge story soon, butwe're completely fine in Guangdong.

The internet is rather slow at the moment, as everyone is on-line before lights out soon, so i didn't really read much. I'd assume that the Red Cross will be helping out. They're good that way. Since the Earth is having an earthquake every few weeks, I can only assume someone at some point will be suggesting people donate to dig out Zhongshan.

new home

2010-04-11T22:31:00.000-07:00

The new home is pretty nice. It's on campus, but so far I've been freet o come and go and have visitors as I please. No curfew, not harassing of people the guards don't know. I planned on staying here part time and spending most of my time at the other place closer to the city, but i'm finding myself here more and more

one reason is this. The school provides a computer and it works. Hence, this post has photos. When I transfer old vacation photos to here, there will be good photos.

Contrary to all expectations, the bed is comforatble. This puts them ahead of every other school I've worked at in China

Living room

The kitchen is ok, except for the electric stove. The stove itself is fine, but if there's no power, there's no way to cook. not a huge problem so far.

2010-04-08T17:47:00.000-07:00

I've been listening to the new Massive Attack constantly, which leads to listening to old Massive Attack, which leads to having Angel in my head all the time

Had a recent discusiion about bad music. Arguably the worst song ever

new job

2010-04-08T17:21:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was the last of my introduction classes, so I've seen every student I have. There are many. I think close to 1000. I will not be learning names. I'd be surprised if I remember faces.

So far the school is fine. The apartment is nice enough, the other staff reasonably friendly, and my workload is very light. I am still teaching at another college in my copious free time, so money is not an issue. For now, I have nothing to complain about.

I teach 9 classes a week, all double periods. Each class is one and a half hours. Twice a week (including a little later today) I teach Business English students. The rest of the time, I am teaching non-English majors, many of whom don't really want to learn English. Some are wildly enthusiastic. About what I'd expect. The 7 non-English classes are every other week, so I have 14 classes of them. These students do not receive a grade, so I only need to grade one class, and homework is not necessary. So I teach them if they want to learn, and ignore them otherwise.

I went exploring the area around my new home last night for a while. I was looking for, and found, a market, the supermarket, restaurants (preferably one with pictures, so I can point at what I want), a convenience stores, bike repair shops and places with pool tables. I was also hoping to find a bar or club and a dvd shop, but oddly enough failed at both. There are guys selling dvds off of carts, but they only have Chiense. Still, how can you have a large college and no bar in walking distance? Stranger, I found a few tattoo places. Tattoos are not very common in China, and while there are a few tattoo parlors in Zhongshan, I have no idea where there are a few here in the middle of nowhere.

I've gotten better at calculating how much power my scooter has, so trips to and from the center of the city are getting quicker as I am now able to go over 20 kph. (must remember to remind Michelle and Karen that if they want me to drive them around, it is important to mention that before I drive around a few hours. Those last few blocks home, it's more fun to ride the scooter than to push it)

last night, set up the Wii and decided to play to make sure it was working. Somehow, 5 hours disappeared. I think I know what will eat up a lot of my time soon.

Hacked

2010-03-29T01:10:00.000-07:00

If you received any strange e-mails from me; no, I did not make an unexpected trip to Europe, get robbed, and ask you for money. I have lost access to facebook and my hotmail accounts. If trying to reach me, I guess you can use the same name at yahoo instead of hotmail.

Hopefully, that gets resolved soon.

Not Enough

2010-03-23T21:02:00.000-07:00

and why not...

I'm in love with those songs

Birthday

2010-03-23T19:58:00.000-07:00

I aged another year. 36 is aooarently a moderately interesting birthday here, as it means it's the same zodiac year as when I was born. In other words, I'm a tiger, and it's the year of the tiger. Seems a flimsy excuse to celebrate, but flimsy excuses are better than no excuses.

Spent Saturday at work. hardly exciting, but useful, as i tend to spend money on things like food, rent, and toothpaste (need to buy toothpaste, preferably mildly offensive toothpaste, later today).

At night, a friend came by to cook. Of course, being a female friend of mine generally means you can't cook, so I cooked for us and a roommate.

After that, went to Friends Bar. A night of drinking was planned, but kind of derailed by Karen. her gift to me was to buy tickets for some wargaming thing Sunday. She didn't think to ask the time, which led to us having to be there at 8:30 on Sunday. Good news for my liver, as most people opted for the simpler "let me buy you a beer/shot for your birthday" plan. Kudos to Robert for successfully making Dr pepper using booze.

Sunday started early. Karen popped up to make sure i could get there. coincidentally, she arrived hungry as i was cooking. Christ says to feed the hungry. he never said there'd be paintball involved as a result. More people probably would if he had.

Due to her expert guidance and detailed knowledge of her hometwon, we arrived only 25 minutes late, missing most of the safety demonstrations and other useless nonsense. We were not there too late for the pre-shooting activities:

first, climb a tower about 7 meters high. Once there, jump out and catch a trapeze bar. This does require a harness, as most missed the bar. This was awkward, as I am deathly afraid of heights. Climbing up 20 feet or so seems like torture to me, much less leaping out into the air. having travelled with me and been on mountains and cable cars, karen is well aware of this, so she set out to explain the problem. Or rather, tell the guy in charge i was too fat and would probably not be able to climb up. I can recognize shameless manipulation when i see it, so I'm not sure how i wound up on top of the thing. Making the leap was easier for me than for some I guess in that I did it with insane laughter, while some cried.

Next up was wargames. Well, not exactly the wargame part. More like dividing into teams and choosing a captain. This was followed by choosing a name, a slogan, and a competition to see who could sing revolutionary songs better. I was at a slight disadvantage, in that I had never heard most Chinese revolutionary songs before, but really, it was a slight disadvantage, as no one else seemed to know any either. Once my suggestion i teach Clash songs was rejecte, i kind of tuned out.

next up would be the killing, except it was lunch time. karen has a slight speech problem, in that she told the team I'm a good cook, so i wound up doing about half the cooking. Inexplicably, I was able to give good advice on fish steaming. I have never cooked a fish in my life. the veggie stuff was ok.

After lunch and a brief nap, our fearless band headed over to the staging area, where we .... played some sort of game that involved standing is a circle spouting gibberish. losers were required to sing songs mocking their own posteriors. I swear every word of that is true.

from there, we moved to place involving an odd balance challenge. trying to move the entire tema through a filed stepping on little stones and not touching the ground. Karen has unusually small hands and feet. I'm about 8 inches taller than her and don't have unusually small feet. She thought this was challenging. I may have used bad words more than once.

next we headed over to the building where the guns were stored. we went there to use the rope tied toa tree to o something where you need to swing the team from a platform to a tire. First step was getting the rope, which was hanging in the middle. I suggested we tie our shoelaces together and tie them to a shoe, then swing the shoe until it cathes on the rope and pull it in. karen refused to translate, as it was a dumb idea. which in the end is what we did. Uncoordinated people + rope swing=comedy gold. The easiest thing to do was have someone lift people up on the rope, then they get flung acroos, where someone on the other sidecatches the rope and they hop down. This leads to the tallest and strongest person needing to swing over near the end, when the tire is packed full of people. My first attempt was not too different from bowling

Finally, we went out on the field and shot each other. Being the biggest target leads to getting shot a bit. Karen earned a timeout by removing her mask, and we both got one for shooting our team. repeatedly. in her case, at close range. I at least had the decency to snipe at her from behind a tree for a while. In the end, we lost at capture the flag, which i believe is because the team rejected my suggestion that we dig trenches and scrounge for barbed wireOr maybe it was that the other team had a few cops and our team was mostly salesman. Or maybe the ammo we wasted shooting each other would have been better spent onthe other side. Who knows.

So, 8:30 -5:30 had roughly an hour of actual fighting, and I got to cook three times for other people, including a group of ten. it was a lot of fun, though k was worried I'd be annoyed by all the non-shooting stuff. She took me out to dinner, and continued her amazing streak of choosing awful restaurants. Do not ever go with her to try somewhere new. I think she was served cat food.

The highlight of that day? Going to sleep around 8:45 at night

change

2010-03-23T17:20:00.000-07:00

I haven't been much, as I've mostly been looking for work. finally worked out a pretty good deal with a university here. i'll get a place to live, decent money, a fairly light work load, easy classes, and can continue teaching elsewhere, so long as it doesn't interfere with their classes. so i'll be making pretty good money by continuing some of the part time gigs. it's moe hours than i worked before, but i like most of my classes a great deal, so i don't mind.

one of the best things about the job is that it's in Zhongshan. The last frustrating month or two was made way better by friends. In particular, people like Wendy, Lucy, Norm, Mark and probably a few others tried to help me find students, while Karen, Yolanda and Sandy helped by tracking down people at schools where no one spoke English. It was encouraging watching people try to keep me here. Thanks

RIP Alex Chilton

2010-03-17T19:10:00.000-07:00

There's good, there's great, and there's pure genius...

confusion

2010-03-09T02:32:00.002-08:00

I've had a few people over the last few months suggest I move on. Apparently, when you get stabbed, it seems like life isn't going according to plan.

I initially rejected the idea for a simple reason. This is my home, and the place I waited years to come back to. One person was able to arrange for a group of men to attack someone, with the end result that I was hurt, and left with some scars. Not much I can do about that now.

I didn't lie to my emplyer, and they chose to go the route of dishonesty and confrontation. Not much I can do about that now either. I decided to leave instead of battling them all year, which was expensive, but good for my mental health.

What I need to decide is whether or not I want to lose the good parts of my life here. I don't see much danger here, so that's not a reason to leave. I planned on transitioning to freelancing, and wound up doing it way ahead of schedule. I expected it would be difficult, and it is. One thing that's helping so far is the support of friends. People are trying to help me find students and part time work, and buying me drinks or food in order to lure me out of my house.

I expect I'll leave ZS at some point. I haven't seen most of the world, and would like to see a bit more. But I want to leave when it feels like time to move one, not because i'm being chased out. With the various headaches I have, I still am generally quite happy when my alarm goes off and it's time to begin my day, because I love my life and love what I do. I've known very few people who make that claim. I couldn't imagine putting a price on that feeling.

When I was in Hunan, Karen and I bought a kite to set on fire. It's an odd custom. You write wishes on the kite, then light a candle inside it. The flame heats the air, and it takes off like a small blimp. Ideally, it burns up, sending your wish into the next world. I don't know what she wished for, but I was kind of stumped. There seemed to be nothing I really wanted.

So I'm confused by the suggestion I should move on. I'm confused as to why others don't come here. It wouldn't work for everyone, but knowing what I gained, I'm surprised more don't try it.

D&D

2010-03-07T17:20:00.000-08:00

Seems this thing is acting funny again...

Most gaming groupd struggle with scheduling conflicts and a lack of players. Meanwhile, I've had to start a second game in order to satisfy player demand. I'll probably be coaching a new DM soon, as ours is getting too big and we might split in two. Which means i might be a player.

4th edition is growing on me. Netw players seem to like it. Every round people seem to have something cool to do,which was generally not the case with low level spellcasters in older editions. I still prefer 3rd (or pathfinder) but 4th is definitely better than I first thought.

I'm running Keep on the Shadowfell and just beginning Age of Worms, which is being adapted from 3rd edition. The group is happy they have stuff to kill. They were hired to map old ruins as part of a project by a young king. They promptly began making plans to ambush other surveyors to steal their maps and sell them. Then one seduced a surly elf (that's when the guy rolls a natural 20?) who has since turned againsthem, and they wish to kill all the kobolds. Apparently they see the kobold ability to shift a square as a personal affront.

If using the D&D character making program, make sure to equip items before printing. Characters do better with weapons and armor.

Choice quotes

R: Shift back here and let me stab you!

C: I'm happy to work for the king
S; Or kill him
C; Both are ok

R; I can't believe I got that elf chick.
S; Now we should kill her.
stunned silence
R: Is that your policy at the clubs here?
B; Would explain the screams at night
C: and the smell here

M; Being the Dm seems like a lot of work. Why does anyone want to do it?
S; For the ladies

M&K: We want to join
R: I think there's a rule against women gaming
S; They don't have the hand eye coordination to roll dice
K: I'm gonna stab you in the neck!

H: Kobold? like bald? like where you're losing hair?
R" dude, you are losing hair!
5 minutes later
S: Why are the kobolds attacking me? Those two called you bald

B; so because they can shift around easily, you feel the need for genocide?
all: YES!!

Timing

2010-03-03T18:48:00.000-08:00

Since moving back to China, I have missed one day of work do to illness. I missed a lot of work due to stabbing, but, again, injury and sickness are different. So now that I'm freelancing and have no sick days, i came down with the worst flu I've had in ages. The last time I was this sick was wehn I had the whooping cough.
The good news is that my schedule is relatively light, so I've been able to make every lesson. i think I've even done an adequate job of teaching, though they were far from my best classes. The bad news is that I've been too ill to hound people about more hours. This could be an expensive illness.

For those who have never heard my frequent complaint, most conversations i have with schools follow a similar pattern.. they ooh and ahh at finding out I'm experienced. When they see I'm a certified teacher, they're in rapture. They say they're thrilled, as i'm the most qualified applicant they've ever had. Then they offer me the same salary they'd offer a high school grad who has never taught a class in his life. When questioned, they explain that this is the starting salary they pay everyone.

The two exceptions so far are the Radio and TV College (no connection to the one in GZ) and Capital, both of which seem willing to pay more for someone who seems a good teacher. So they are my priority. Th downside with Capital is that they charge the same rate to students irregardless of what the teacher is paid. So if i am paid more then someone else, it makes sense for them to use the cheaper guy.

It's the first month doing this, and Iexpected it to be slow. That I'm spending most of my time on the sofa coughing and drifting in and out is making it worse. but it seems my fever has broken and i should be able to resume talking to schools today. More to come...
T

Thing i learned in Suzhou

2010-03-03T18:37:00.000-08:00

Suzhou has a museum devoted to firefighters. Chinese people should not be allowed unsupervised access to a bell. one month later, my ears are still ringing

2001

2010-02-27T02:39:00.001-08:00

Men find obelisk,
Embark on galactic quest
To find its birthplace.

Suzhou I

2010-02-27T02:09:00.001-08:00

Suzhou is famed for it's canals, much like a dirtier venice. So we rode around in a boat

Suzhou is famous for traditional Chinese music. Apparently, their dialect sounds prettier than most. I don't have the knowledge to evaluate, but these two were good

by comparison

2010-02-26T01:05:00.000-08:00

I have yet another insight into myself, based on things I've been compared to. according to Tuly, Karen and Alina in separate conversations, I am dumber than the following.

a rock
the homeless guy playing the harmonica
a monkey
a baby monkey
"a very stupid man who is also drunk"
an apple
an orange
a carrot
not a banana (apparently the dumbest fruit)
most other foreigners
curling (the sport)
a weight (at the gym)
a chicken
a rabbit
eels
a fish (we were near a place where you pick the animal you want to eat, and most of the animals seemed smarter than me)
a tree
two dogs having sex

in other news, people suck

Love in the Time of Cholera

2010-02-25T01:34:00.000-08:00

waiting for love hurts
fifty years is far too long
but might be worth it

by Andy

Love in the Time of Cholera

2010-02-25T01:30:00.000-08:00

waiting for love hurts
fifty years is far too long
but might be worth it

From Andy

WuXi II

2010-02-25T01:09:00.000-08:00

Karen inside the temple. Because no batch of photos is complete without her smiling face
a few stories of Buddha there

behold the glory of the multi-colored temple ceiling!

Moby Dick

2010-02-24T01:47:00.001-08:00

years ago, a group of us were trying to rewrite classic books as haiku. The idea was abandoned when we discovered that a book of such already existed. I've decided to repost some of them here.

Moby Dick
Call me Ishmael
Ahab hunts the white whale
Vengence is not good

by Adam, i think

can't read it

2010-02-19T22:06:00.000-08:00

this has become an unhealthy obsession

slave to the wage

2010-02-19T22:01:00.000-08:00

all good things come to an end, and my holiday is no exception. I'll be working on Monday it seems. I'll just be doing a small amount of tutoring next week, with classes beginning at a few places the following week.

it just struck me that i might be tutoring Monday to Saturday, and i bartend Sunday nights, so i somehow have a seven day work week. I expect that will change rather quickly.

I might be switching my bartending day to Monday. So if you're a Zhongshan resident, consider joining me for discount wine Mondays instead of half price appetizer Sundays. Please come save me from the same introductory conversation with Chinese strangers I have every week. if you won't do it for me, do it to save betty and Judy from the hassles of trying to have a conversation with me for a few hours.

Wuxi

2010-02-19T21:38:00.000-08:00

Wuxi is a place I'd never heard of. Of course, that describes most of China. It's a big place. It's famous for great views of lakes, which we skipped, as it was near freezing, and a temple, which wasn't skipped. One of the biggest temples i've been to. very nice

inside the pillar was a baby Buddha, which is born every day and washed by dragons.

the temple from the outside.

Karen described the serene temple and the beautiful surroundings as "one of the most boring things I ever saw. Easily one of the most boring."

For whatever reason, I can't upload any more photos right now. I'll see if the site cooperates tomorrow or Monday

2010-02-17T23:14:00.000-08:00

Karen

2010-02-17T23:09:00.000-08:00

A natural question might be "Why is that girl in so many pictures?" Easy, because most of the pictures have her in them. She has some sort of sixth sense that tells her when I'm considering taking a picture of something, and it causes her to leap in front of it and strike a pose. No way around it. I either had to ditch her or take endless photos of her.

She makes up for it by being fun to travel with and translating for me, so i can be lazy and not speak Chinese as much.

Still, if anyone wants to photoshop her out of some photos and send them to me, I won't object

Yangzhou

2010-02-17T22:39:00.000-08:00

Yangzhou is one of the canal cities, famous for sceneries. It was a pleasant trip, but not a place you definitely need to see before you die. Come back after and feast upon their brains.

not fast

2010-02-17T22:37:00.000-08:00

between a slow internet connection and having to go through proxies to access blogger, it's taking a while to upload photos. I'll continue to do so, but it may be a few weeks before i'm done.

Just got back today from Hunan. Was a good trip. Look for photos in March.

Work looks fine beginning around March 1. Still ironing out details. I'll be working at several schools part time, giving greater flexibility and more money. Sounds good.

Nanjing II

2010-02-17T22:06:00.001-08:00

Nanjing Food

2010-02-12T02:46:00.000-08:00

we found smelly tofu

Nanjing

2010-02-12T01:55:00.001-08:00

Like every relaxing vacation, our trip began at about 3am. We took a bus to the guangzhou airport and sat around waiting for an early flight.

Karen hasn't travelled a lot, and was delighted to be in a plane. I'm a bit more jaded
Nanjing is a former capital with a long history, but is most famous for being the site of massacres under the Japanese during WWII. There is a large park as a memorial.

We were feeding birds. My slow, uncoordinated partner in photography missed the birds actually landing on me.

preview of coming distractions

2010-01-27T22:29:00.000-08:00

I'm just sitting around doing nothing this week. Next week I'll be in Shanghai and the surrounding area. Followed by a week here, and then I think a ttrip to Guilin. Pictures to follow

Things I learned

2010-01-15T21:44:00.000-08:00

Chinese massage places have something they do where they put a flame under a glass bal and then stick it on your back. this creates a suction effect. it's supposed to remove negative energy. I'm not sure it does, but it does leave bruises and cause swelling, so people that have it look like they have pepperonis on their backs.

I went with a friend to try this. She never had, not had I. She went first, and spent the entire 15 minutes complaining about it. I spent the entire 15 minutes wondering if my hair would be lit on fire.

Then I learned that body hair stops the balls from sticking.

So, if you have back hair, you don't get pointless bruises from a masseuse.

moving on

2010-01-08T18:06:00.000-08:00

My school has agreed to release me from the contract without charging me a penalty. I'll be finishing the term and leaving. So i have a few weeks left. I'll miss some of my students, but nothing else.

My troubles began when I was stabbed. If all goes according to plan, thy will choose a replacement I recommended through others, that being Chris, the intended victim that night. So they replace a guy who was stabbed twice in a bar fight with one stabbed 7 times. Genius!

I'll probably be freelancing here, tutoring and maybe working a few places part time. To those in the statres, that probably sounds like I'm quitting a full time teaching gig to deliver pizzas and cut lawns, but the money will actually be better and I'll probably have fewer headaches. There's astill a chance that I'll instead strike out for a new part of the country, but I'm pretty content here.

pictures of home

2010-01-08T17:58:00.000-08:00

Christmas

2009-12-25T23:46:00.000-08:00

Christmas Eve was spent with old Chinese friends. Well, they're younger than me, but still old friends.

Christmas Day was spent with old lao wai friends. Norm cooked, and again it was incredible food. It turns out that you can get about 2 liters of champagne for about $4 US. Not great, but drinkable. Sat and talked until late.

I may be giving myself a better phone for Christmas. So I'd have a working camera and can post pictures.

I need to get in more trouble. There are only so many ways to say "my day was filled with joy, and I am at peace."

Eastern Union

2009-12-25T23:39:00.000-08:00

My permanently broke colleague Robert had someone send money to him from the US via Western Union. here are the reasons he has been unable to get the money so far:

1. The bank is open, but the Western Union part is closed from 11:30-2:00.
2. The bank is open, but the Western Union part closes at 4:00.
3. No one can read English, so they don't know if the form is correct.
4. The money was sent to someone with the same first and last name, but there is no middle initial on the money, and there's one on the passport.
5. The girl translating for Robert has no ID, so they aren't sure she should be there.
6. They need his address in China.
7. They have our address, but want one of us to write it in Chinese.
8. there pens are out of ink, and they aren't sure his blue pen is acceptable.
9. They aren't sure how much it converts to in renminbi. (conversion rates were posted on the wall)
10. They don't have US dollars (he doesn't actually want dollars).
11. he cursed at them, so they don't want to help him.

Huang Pu

2009-12-13T17:02:00.000-08:00

Wound up meeting some friends in Huang Pu this weekend. It's on the outskirts of Guangzhou (Canton), a city I have always hated.

it was kind of like a trip back in time. less developed than Zhongshan, and I never saw another foreigner. people stopped and stared most places I went. Apart from the people I went to see, I never spoke English. The girls in the group were annoyed that Chinese men in a club were far more interested in meeting me than them.

Just drove home how Zhongshan has changed. We aren't as exotic here now. We are still weird, and sometiems draw stares, but many people have gotten used to us.

One day, people will stop staring at me slackjawed. Not today, but someday

Resolution

2009-12-11T15:34:00.000-08:00

In the end, my employer blinked. i got paid for my time off. The school says they will not be trying to replace me. I'm kind of skeptical on that, and will be trying to leave before they have a chance to fire me, but may finish out the year. I think I have a part time job that could become full time if necessary.

I know a few people in town were offered my job, nd it seems the responses ranged from polite refusal, to very impolite refusal. Thanks guys.

Things I learned

2009-12-11T15:32:00.000-08:00

Going to All You Can Drink San Miguel Thursdays at the Friends bar makes Friday difficult

one month later

2009-11-30T03:16:00.000-08:00

10/30 is the day I went out and got stabbed, though i guess it happened early on the 31st.

I just got home from work, and carried the batteries up from my scooter. Each is about the size of a car battery. Not a major feat, but this is the first day I was able to do that without the left arm dropping it or it hurting a lot. So the damaged muscles are apparently healing.

My boss suggested I'd be paid, which is good. he also approached a friend and offered him my job behind my back, which is...also good. I want out of here. My friend turned it down, and the school apparently plans on not telling me anything until a replacement has been found. I plan on being gone soon, though I may wait until after the Chinese New Year. I guess I'd rather they pay me for the few weeks off.

Last night was my debut as a bartender at Friends. went well, largely because I don't do much other than talk to people and put beer in buckets. I have a lot of practice talking, and taking beer out of buckets.

oh i received an apology and money from the guy responible for the stabbing. i don't believe he's sincere, and the amount was less than half of what i'm out after medical bills and suspensions. others are working on his deportation and getting him fired. I'm not spiteful, but would prefer the next attempted murder not be in my city. I'd like him to just leave, but apparently he wants to be driven out. I am not involved in what they're doing. people look out for me (and the other injured ones).

November sucked.

new addiction

2009-11-23T19:50:00.000-08:00

see more Funny Graphs

graph jam is awesome

Continuing the nonsense

2009-11-23T17:22:00.000-08:00

I am still struggling with my employer. I am back at work, but they do not intend to pay me for the time I was off, most of which I missed because they would not allow me to return. Their reasoning is:

1. My contract promises me 15 days paid sick leave. i was not sick. i was injured. I do not have injury leave. This is the first time anyone I have spoken with here has heard that argument.

2. I did nothing to arrange for my classes to be covered when injured, so they had to hire someone else. Again, i am unaware of any other company which requires an ill or injured person to find their own replacement.

3. It isn't fair they have to pay me when I'm not working. Admittedly, they wrote a contract and signed it, saying they would, but only a truly depraved man would expect them to do such a thing.

4. i haven't had the decency to apologize for what i did, and seem unremorseful. One would almost think I don't regret trying to save someone's life, and might do it again in a similar situation

So, at the moment i'm back. The school had pressured me into not trying to force the police to do anything about an attempted murder that scarred me for life because someof their teachers do not have the proper work visas. They are now enraged that I am planning to go to arbitration for half a month's salary, as this is far more likely to lead to the discovery of their illegal workers. It's not inconceivable that I'll mention it in my written complaint. I'd hate to think of people who are uninvolved being deported over this, but I get more offended each day. Cooperating with the police led to my punishment. They felt i was putting them at risk. But they will risk it to save under $900.

Otherwise, the job hasn't been too bad, so it is likely I won't ask for a release in arbitration. i kind of like the thought of forcing them to pay me while they are fined hundreds of thousands of reminbi, then continuing my job as though nothing happened. I could probably get a release and more more money, but this is much more fun

prices paid and benefits earned

2009-11-16T14:32:00.000-08:00

Saying that things have been strange lately is an understatement. Living in China as an expat is different than I imagine it would be living as an immigrant in America. Can't say for sure, but I believe we feel safer.

a bit over 10 years ago, i arrived in Zhongshan, and in my first week, I was directed to the Friends Bar. It was (and is) a fairly unassuming place. I've been in other expat bars here and elsehwere, and they tend to be a bit dark, with flags from all over, a bunch of Chinese people, and classic rock playing. Friends wasn't really any different. Nothing wrong with it. just a comfortable bar.

A few hours later i understood why I had been told to go there. A group of other foreigners discovered there were a few new people, and came over and introduced themselves. The welcome was fairly overwhelming.

Over time, I'd be in and out of that group, as i developed close friendships with many locals, but there was always a feeling of welcome there. It sounds cliched to say we tended to act like a family, but that's what my memory assures me was the case.

So ten years have gone by, and there are about 20 times the foreigners there were then. There are 3 foreign bars in ZS, and another on the way. There are also those who prefer different Chinese clubs, more who stay home, and plenty of people I have never met. There are a lot of advantages to living in a place with a larger foreign population. Can buy better cheese. better restaurants (I need to stop blogging before I eat). There are chances to do things other than sit in the same bar with the same people and hear the same stories. Generally, it's better to be here now instead of in 99.

Then this happened. I'm only aware of one crime this serious involving a foreigner in Zhongshan. There has been violence, but nothing near this. What makes it worse is that one of us called guys to kill another one of us, and they did it in a place we always called home.

So there are two conflicting things happening now. There is a fear now that wasn't here a month ago. There are definitely some people who want to sit at home for a bit, and wait to make sure this is over (I do believe it is, but no one is sure). there are people who go out, but avoid Friends, or all the foreign bars. It feels at times like I'm in a long story, and the narrator is saying "Things were never quite the same. It was hard to get back to normal, and people began to move on to other places. last i heard, Bill had moved on to Sri Lanka, where he runs a fish and chip stand near the beach. Shame the man hates seafood with a passion."

At the same time, there is a certain closeness and concern that had disappeared. One of us was attacked, and the four foreigners there leapt to his defense. thirty seconds later, the staff was there, helping those of us who were bleeding. We ran out without telling them where we were going, so they called other staff members, until one was found with my nuumber. So when this happened, the intended victim wasn't alone. Everyone nearby tried to help. One of the few good things I saw at that time was that there was no hesitation on anyone's part. Chris was attacked, and 4 moved at once to help. When i got hurt, a few 18-20 year old waitresses ran towards me with towels instead of running in the office and locking the door, or heading out the front door. There is a peculiar comfort you can take in that.

The instinct people had was to help. I can certainly attest that the impulse extended to others. I got a lot of phone calls from people. Some were trying to learn what happened, but almost everyone asked the same questions: Can I help Chris? and Can I help you? People have been supportive, offering time, money, food, encouragement, advice, and whatever else i needed.

Robert, the young guy in the fight, has had a few more experienced guys take an interest in him, offering to teach him more about international trade and sales. It's partially a way to thank him, and partially, I think, a desire to help a newer guy out. people are going beyond what they need to do, in a way they might not have done a few months ago.

I certainly do not believe that what happened is for the best. I sincerely hope that the responsible party is either deported or imprisoned. A lot of people are harmed, and the potential closeness wasn't worth it. Just noting what I see

Update

2009-11-14T03:18:00.001-08:00

Got the stitches out. Ugly scar, but looks much better than expected. It looked like some sort of zombie arm at first. A benefit of being a hairy guy is that it may hide the scar, at least somewhat.

Most of the physical problems are gone. My blood levels are getting back to normal. I'm off antibiotics, so I can drink again, and I can drink very cheaply, as less blood means you get wasted on a few beers. hey, do i mock your silver linings?

Still suspended. I asked for a release from my contract. they threatened to cancel my visa immediately. I threatened to turn in my colleagues who don't have proper work visas. they agreed to pay me for next week and to allow me to return after that. I have a sneaking suspicion I will not be employee of the month.

I have a friend who is trying to hook me up with a dream job in Sichuan, and if not, I have multiple offers here. What i don't have is a good internet connection, so I'll end this while I still have some access

Things I learned

2009-11-09T17:06:00.000-08:00

Don't tell your friends about your imminent departure to begin teaching in Japan until you see that the contract you are sent reflects the deal you negotiated. otherwise, you spend the whole day texting clarification

start again

2009-11-07T17:46:00.001-08:00

It seems I'll be able to post again, at least for a while.

Things are not terribly different than they were 5 months ago. Switched schools, to a place that treats me much better. not necessarily good, but better.

My students are much worse than before. basically, I am teaching in a program for rich students who have flunked out of or been kicked out of other schools. their parents want them to go to university, but they have no chance of passing the exams. So a back door is being created. If they can pass an English exam, they can attend a university to study business and English. So I need to get them ready for the IELTS exam. None speak English well, most speak it very poorly, and a few can't communicate simple ideas in English. One can't answer questions like "what's your name?" but all are taking an exam to see if they can begin studying accounting or finance next year in univeristy classes taught in English. They frequently refuse to do assignments or open their book. The school will not allow most rewards or punishments. Everyone agrees I will fail in my task, but not much that can be done. Since they come from important, rich families, they will be fine. At least until they take over the family business and destroy it, but that's years away.

Little changes regarding friends and the town as a whole. Zhongshan changes, but only slightly it seems.

Last weekend, a friend was attacked by a group of knife wielding gangsters. a few friends and I intervened, and were stabbed. Their original target was stabbed multiple times in the chest and back. One guy was stabbed in the leg, and another in the hand. I had my arm sliced open and was stabbed in ...uh...the posterior. All of us are out of the hospital, and everyone will recover completely. In that regard, we were very lucky.

Why the stabbing? Another foreigner was mad at my friend over a pool game. So he called thugs to scare him, and they instead decided to remove him. So my feelings regarding Chinese haven't changed, just my contempt for Canadians.

My employer is insisting I take a few weeks off to recover. My wounds aren't that big a deal, but the blood loss left me a wreck. One week later, I'm almost back to normal. I think they just want this kept quiet. It's really cool that they are telling me to rest and recover. It's not so cool they are saying I should have run off and called the cops, as a teacher getting into a fight will give the school a bad reputation. Put simply, they are saying i should have let my friend die. There is little doubt that would have been the outcome. I may be replaced due to this, but the other foreign teachers have made it clear that they will resign immediately, and no other foreigners will take my place. At least not from Zhongshan.

Turns out I'm pretty well liked here. I spend a lot of time at home resting, but trek out ot the hospital every day to have the bandages changed. friends are doing a good job of making sure i'm fed, translating for me with doctorsm and generally keeping me happy. Which reminds me that I'm meeting some xiolan friends soon. Finally convinced them to come here to see me. All it took was some blood loss.

To those who heard before and have been sending support, it is appreciated. This is the worst time I've had in China, and I can't wait to move on.

where am I?

2009-05-06T17:34:00.000-07:00

Internet is down again. Third world living has it's drawbacks

things she learned

2009-05-03T01:00:00.000-07:00

I taught a young woman named Yan back in 2000 in Xiaolan. We've had sporadic contact sense, and bonded over the last month or two. She went with me on a trip to Hainan, which was a blast. She brought an electronic dictionary that translated at times for us, and the following is a partial list of things she translated:
thong
hirsute
drunkard
buffoon
aggravation
motion sickness
manic
knave
albino
thug
discord
nonsense
declasse
pointless
pennywise, pound foolish
nerd
butler
dysentry
blind
sea sick
bald
unappealing

Sums up travelling with me pretty well

things I learned

2009-04-27T03:18:00.000-07:00

There are people who will sell mobile phones with cameras and mp3 players which cannot be connected to a computer without blue tooth, but not sell the blue tooth. So, no pictures.

Off to Hainan tomorrow. Days in the tropical sun. Wager wisely on just how burned I will be which day.

Wii and beaches

2009-04-24T21:46:00.000-07:00

The wii works fine now most of the time, so blogging suffers. I must choose between telling tales of students or Lego Star Wars. Incidentally, the Wiis at the electronics store with the Sony sign near the Star Ferry in TST work fine oncce you set them up. Just took a native English and a native Chinese speaker to get to that point. They can be bought cheaper, but they do work.

On another unrelated topic, when playing lego Star Wars, it seems that you need Jar jar to leap about on Naboo. He does it better than the rest. This interferes with the joy I take in slashing him to pieces with a lightsaber. Since I've completed 3 levels out of 160, I don't think I'll ever finish it, but I can't see what greater thrill the game could provide than that, unless it combines Dance dance revolution with Hutts.

On an increasingly unrelated topic, I am heading back to Hainan. I've decided i like being cash strapped each month. Bought a bike, and was poor. Bought a Wii, and was poor. Time to travel and resume being poor. Sanya is a place with nice beaches and monkeys, and there's little else i want in a vacation. I hear it's getting more developed, but that there are still places that accomodate backpackers.

Might rent a motorcycle and drive around the island a bit, visiting a few remote towns. There are a fe flaws with that plan. First, i don't have a credit card. Second, I don't have a driver's license. Third, I'm still sketchy on the intricacies of motorcycles (as opposed to scooters), and might smear myself over the road. Fourth, I speak roughly three words of the hainan dialect, and not a word of the minority languages, which i think are closer to Thai or Vietnamese. I've had Chinese friends tell me that a lot of Hainanese have a weak grasp of mandarin, and cantonese is unknown.

So i might stick to the beach. And Monkey Mountain. You create a monkey preserve, I believe I am obligated to go.

things I learned

2009-04-24T21:42:00.000-07:00

When someone turns off the light on their electric bike to save power and drives the wrong way down the street at night, blows a red light, and almost hits you, it is possible to slap them off the bike. The face of a person being slapped off a scooter cannot be compared to any other facial expression.

Also learned that Chinese police are remarkably unsympathetic to people who are slapped off bikes when they almost crash into people in a crosswalk.

And Officer Leung is a handsome, witty charming man. A paragon of virtue, and a credit to Chinese culture. All hail this officer's wise decisions, as we enter an era of slapping

phone

2009-04-15T05:33:00.000-07:00

had a few visitors lately, so I haven't been on-line much. Just wanted to know the phone is back on. Yay!

Grandpa needs sleep!

2009-04-10T19:17:00.000-07:00

had a friend visit for a week, and spent the week preparing for the visit, drinking, and recovering.

While she was here, a few people made off hand comments about me that were sometimes rather flattering. My students were kind of embarrassing a few times. Not quite the saint they at times portrayed (though they also described me as fat with bad writing. One referred to me as "stupid" which will not be forgotten soon).

Was a weird and somewhat humbling week that way.

Last night, someone gave me a message a bit after midnight, hoping I could meet her and some others. As I was sound asleep, I ignored it. I then received a call about 1:00. Same request. Tempting as the offer of leaving my house with my almost empty wallet to drink with the Euros was, I decided to go back to sleep. After a few more calls, ending at 3:40,I was considering a new number.

so Zhongshan, thanks for the kind words and love. Now just back off a little bit, you smothering drunks

things I learned

2009-04-04T04:56:00.000-07:00

If you rely largely on pantomine to say "please trim the beard a little, you get a goattee.

things I learned

2009-03-30T03:45:00.000-07:00

Chinese motorcycle taxi drivers are unbeatable at games of chicken. Don't even try it. They have nothing to live for, and will take you down.

I also learned I'm good at swerving

I understand the Amish

2009-03-30T03:09:00.000-07:00

Been a week of technical glitches and human error.

My camera has finally been returned. shame she took out the memory card to swipe my pictures. So, someday I will have more pictures, including the few birthday ones.

Bought a Wii. Unfortunately, didn't think to buy an adaptor. The plus is an odd shape, and my outlets are a different odd shape, so finding a way to bring the two together is proving challenging. Gives me something to do I guess. Might have to change the plugs, which would be fine if I had an ounce of handiness about me.

The seat on the motorbike isn't locking most of the time. Free batteries for any curious person. Need to drive across town and get it fixed. Hopefully tomorrow that can be combined with shopping for an adaptor.

Rather annoyingly, my phone line at home is more or less down. Tons of static. So my apologies to those who have taken the time to call, just to hear hissing and shrill beeping. If you call for anything important and can hear me answer, blurt out the important news! I am lucky if I get 30 seconds a call that are clear.

otherwise, things go well. The school wants a syllabus. I want to know when classes end and how long we are off for MayDay. Seems to be a standoff developing. I should win, as I can't really write a syllabus without knowing how many classes I'll have. Also don't know if i have the day off for the Ching Ming Festival

Classes remain great. My painfully shy class is stil uiet, but some progress has been amde. Most of the others are a blast.

dude, where's my camera?

2009-03-26T01:41:00.000-07:00

On my birthday, I gave my camera to a friend who was going home, knowing the night would continue. The batteries had died, so there was no point to keeping it. She had complained we don't see each other enough.

The next day, she said she was busy until Friday, when I'll be going to Hong Kong. So, there may be photos Sunday.

If you chip away at the ide in the lowest level of dante's hell, eventually you reach a student run English corner, where no one has any idea what they're doing. I'll be having nightmares for weeks.